I wrote a post a long time ago about Mommy Wars. Ashlyn was only five months old when I wrote that post so I was still considered a new mom. I still stand by all of the things I wrote in that post and all of the decisions I made with my daughter.
I have been following a lot of different people on Instagram lately and that is what has brought me to post this. While I decided to stay away from the whole Mommy Wars thing, apparently not everyone has. I am seeing more and more things geared towards Mommy Wars and it really angers me.
The other day someone posted something about how ignorant people are because they don't know anything about cloth diapering. I mean really? I always thought cloth diapering was kind of gross. Now I'm starting to consider it. That doesn't make me ignorant it just makes me mis-informed.
I never thought I'd want to cloth diaper but things change. We are working on one income now and are trying to find ways to save money. Our trash pile seems to grow and grow each week and we are trying to find ways to cut back. And how cute are little cloth diapers on baby bottoms?
I am constantly seeing posters for breast is best and breastfeed your kids and breastfeeding in public. Look...I get it. I really do. I didn't breastfeed my first. I tried like hell to breastfeed my second and it didn't work out. I know breast is best but dam! You don't see me going to a breastfeeding mom and saying bottle is best! You don't see me pushing that shit onto anyone.
It's really very annoying to me that some breastfeeding moms are just so pushy about it. Breastfeeding isn't for everyone. It's a lot of work. I'm not saying it's not worth it, I'm just saying it's not for everyone. And not everyone can breastfeed. I wasn't able to, not because I didn't want to, but because I couldn't boost my supply enough. But why do I have to explain that? Why am I being judged because I have to use formula?
I have been following a lot of different people on Instagram lately and that is what has brought me to post this. While I decided to stay away from the whole Mommy Wars thing, apparently not everyone has. I am seeing more and more things geared towards Mommy Wars and it really angers me.
The other day someone posted something about how ignorant people are because they don't know anything about cloth diapering. I mean really? I always thought cloth diapering was kind of gross. Now I'm starting to consider it. That doesn't make me ignorant it just makes me mis-informed.
I never thought I'd want to cloth diaper but things change. We are working on one income now and are trying to find ways to save money. Our trash pile seems to grow and grow each week and we are trying to find ways to cut back. And how cute are little cloth diapers on baby bottoms?
I am constantly seeing posters for breast is best and breastfeed your kids and breastfeeding in public. Look...I get it. I really do. I didn't breastfeed my first. I tried like hell to breastfeed my second and it didn't work out. I know breast is best but dam! You don't see me going to a breastfeeding mom and saying bottle is best! You don't see me pushing that shit onto anyone.
It's really very annoying to me that some breastfeeding moms are just so pushy about it. Breastfeeding isn't for everyone. It's a lot of work. I'm not saying it's not worth it, I'm just saying it's not for everyone. And not everyone can breastfeed. I wasn't able to, not because I didn't want to, but because I couldn't boost my supply enough. But why do I have to explain that? Why am I being judged because I have to use formula?
On a side note...while I am all for breast feeding, I am not for breast feeding in public. Sorry it's just something I want to see.
The whole solids debate is just ridiculous. Feed your kid solids when you want to not when anyone else tells you to. I started Ashlyn on solids between four and five months and I have done the same with my son. Ashlyn took a little longer to get the hang of it. My little guy eats like a champ. If you don't want to start your kid on solids until he or she is 6 months old, go for it. I chose to do it a little earlier because my kids are little piggys.
But I'm also not pushy about. My son has his days when he just doesn't seem to want to eat solids. That's fine. We put it away and try again later. It's not a big deal. He'll eat when he's ready. Oh and I used store bought foods although I am looking into making my own.
I don't work on schedules. My daughter does not go to bed at one particular time each night. She does not wake up at one particular time each morning. So it's 8pm and she wants to watch a movie? Big deal! She can go to bed after the movie. It's 9am and she's still asleep? Big deal! She'll wake up when she's ready.
Don't you find strict routines stressful? I do! If I sent my kid to bed every single night at 8pm, not only would I cause a lot stress in all of our lives, but my husband would barely get to spend any time with her. I'm sorry but letting her stay up a little later is worth the family time. It's worth the extra smiles and laughs and hugs and kisses.
Sure we are pretty much always late for everything because we are always schedule lenient but who cares? If that strict schedule works for you, great! I know that at some point our kids will have to follow a better schedule but for now, I say...let them be little!
The whole point of this post is not to say that my way is the right way and your way is wrong. It's to say this is how I do things so respect it. I respect you and your way of parenting so respect mine.
Things certainly change over time. I never ever wanted to co-sleep and did not allow my daughter in our bed. But our son would only sleep cuddled up to me at night for the first few weeks so I did what I had to do to survive. He sleeps in his crib now but I kind of miss the little bit of co-sleeping I did.
Ashlyn cried it out (sort of). Bryan...not happening. We will have to find another way to get him to sleep through the night because crying it out doesn't work for him. Like his sister, though, he never liked to be swaddled. So we didn't do it. Unlike his sister, he likes to be held a lot. And we hold him a lot. Oh and both my kids get full vaccinations.
I know that there are a ton of things in this post that people can attack. Nasty things can be said because I do things a certain way. Get over it! My parenting style is not any better than anyone else's! It's just what works for my family.
I just don't understand why these Mommy Wars still exists. Ladies, no offense but get over yourselves. Your way is not better than my way and my way is not better than your way.
Mommies Unite!
The whole solids debate is just ridiculous. Feed your kid solids when you want to not when anyone else tells you to. I started Ashlyn on solids between four and five months and I have done the same with my son. Ashlyn took a little longer to get the hang of it. My little guy eats like a champ. If you don't want to start your kid on solids until he or she is 6 months old, go for it. I chose to do it a little earlier because my kids are little piggys.
But I'm also not pushy about. My son has his days when he just doesn't seem to want to eat solids. That's fine. We put it away and try again later. It's not a big deal. He'll eat when he's ready. Oh and I used store bought foods although I am looking into making my own.
I don't work on schedules. My daughter does not go to bed at one particular time each night. She does not wake up at one particular time each morning. So it's 8pm and she wants to watch a movie? Big deal! She can go to bed after the movie. It's 9am and she's still asleep? Big deal! She'll wake up when she's ready.
Don't you find strict routines stressful? I do! If I sent my kid to bed every single night at 8pm, not only would I cause a lot stress in all of our lives, but my husband would barely get to spend any time with her. I'm sorry but letting her stay up a little later is worth the family time. It's worth the extra smiles and laughs and hugs and kisses.
Sure we are pretty much always late for everything because we are always schedule lenient but who cares? If that strict schedule works for you, great! I know that at some point our kids will have to follow a better schedule but for now, I say...let them be little!
The whole point of this post is not to say that my way is the right way and your way is wrong. It's to say this is how I do things so respect it. I respect you and your way of parenting so respect mine.
Things certainly change over time. I never ever wanted to co-sleep and did not allow my daughter in our bed. But our son would only sleep cuddled up to me at night for the first few weeks so I did what I had to do to survive. He sleeps in his crib now but I kind of miss the little bit of co-sleeping I did.
Ashlyn cried it out (sort of). Bryan...not happening. We will have to find another way to get him to sleep through the night because crying it out doesn't work for him. Like his sister, though, he never liked to be swaddled. So we didn't do it. Unlike his sister, he likes to be held a lot. And we hold him a lot. Oh and both my kids get full vaccinations.
I know that there are a ton of things in this post that people can attack. Nasty things can be said because I do things a certain way. Get over it! My parenting style is not any better than anyone else's! It's just what works for my family.
I just don't understand why these Mommy Wars still exists. Ladies, no offense but get over yourselves. Your way is not better than my way and my way is not better than your way.
Mommies Unite!
Just like most moms, I agree with some of things you posted and I do things differently with other things, but it really doesn't matter! All that matters is you do what is best for your family, and it's clear that you do!
ReplyDeleteTeam AllMommies!
We are strict schedule people. But that works for us & AJ. I don't get pushing my beliefs & practices on someone else when clearly they have their own groove. My motto: do what works best for you!
ReplyDeleteParents need to do what works best for them and their families. There are lots of things parenting wise I am against but works for others. Doesn't make it right or wrong....just different. I think moms need to get over feeling like parenting is a competition.
ReplyDeleteMommy wars..sigh. Honestly, there is enough pressure to be a great parent without judgment from outsiders. I am definitely not a public breastfeeder, but I don’t care if other people have the courage to do it. I agree with you when it comes to parenting styles- we’re all different, we do what works for us. The notion that there’s a right and wrong way to parent is pretty silly. Mommy wars are ridiculous and I will never [knowingly or willfully] be part of one if I can help it. And if I do engage with unnecessary judgments, feel free to slap me silly.
ReplyDelete