So I read this article on Scary Mommy yesterday I'm a Selfish Mom and Proud of It. Basically what the article boils down to is that Moms deserve to be selfish every now and then. They deserve to take the last piece of cake and enjoy it without little kids grabbing at it. They deserve to take a shower by themselves with little hands swatting at the shower curtain. They deserve to go out of the house without their kids once in a while, even if it's just to go grocery shopping alone.
Moms deserve ME time.
So here's my take on ME time.
I'm all for it. I'm a HUGE advocate. Every mama needs it. Every mama deserves it. Not every mama gets it.
Sure my husband will try to give me some ME time. He says he will play with the kids so I can go upstairs to put some laundry away (because apparently that counts as ME time) or so I can go take a nap or a shower by myself. But let's face it, while dad is a lot of fun (for all of five minutes), eventually the kids always go looking for mama.
Fell down and need a hug and kiss? Where's mama?
Cup empty and need a refill? Where's mama?
Need a new cartoon put on? Where's mama?
All things daddy is completely capable of handling but when it comes to something the kids need, they always go looking for mama.
Don't get me wrong...I love that my kids need me. I love that they know they can count on me. It means I'm doing my job as their mother. They know that no matter what I will be there to help them with whatever they need.
But sometimes mama just needs a break.
I love my kids. I love them like a ridiculous amount and I always miss them when I'm away from them, even if it is just for an hour. But when mama doesn't get her ME time, she gets cranky, tired, impatient. Ain't nobody got time for that.
We are a strong breed, us mamas. We are designed to take a lot of shit and to deal with a lot of shit (literally since my husband gags at the site of shit). We are tough and resilient and we can stick it out for the long haul. But we still need our ME time. We still need time to re energize. To be alone or to be with our friends but to just not be with our kids.
It's not a bad thing!
I want to be able to take care of my kids to the best of my ability. Sometimes that means I need to spend a little time away from them to reboot and recharge. It's completely normal and we shouldn't feel guilty about it as I know many of us mamas do.
I didn't feel this serious need for ME time when I was a working mama. I always felt that the time I had with my girl (since it was just her at the time) was precious and that any second I had not working should be spent with her. I'm sure many other working mamas feel the same way.
And I'm sure many stay at home mams feel the same way I do about ME time. We have kids sticking to us 24/7. We have spills to clean up, meals to make, butts to wipe, fighting to stop, habits to break. Yes, it is our choice to be at home with our children. Yes, we love it. Yes, we are grateful to be able to do it. But that' doesn't mean we don't deserve some ME time.
Working mamas, stay at home mamas, work at home mamas, single mamas, mamas in school....any mama you can possibly think of deserves some ME time.
We also deserve some things to ourselves. I have a stash of mini 100 Grand bars that I have hidden in the bread drawer. They are mine and only mine. I will not share then with the kids because they are mine. They get everything else in the house. They will take food right out of my hands as it's on it's way to my mouth. But they will not get my little mini candy bars.
Maybe that's selfish but it's literally the only thing in the house I don't have to share. I mean they follow me to the bathroom every single time. Do you know how many times a pregnant woman pees in a day? A lot of times. And they always follow.
As soon as they hear a snack bag of any kind or a kitchen cabinet opening, they are on it. They are observing, calculating and stealing whatever it is I am getting. They don't even hesitate, they just take.
Any item that is in my hand becomes a toy to them. Doesn't matter what it is. The TV is for kids shows only. We almost never watch any kind of adult shows on our 52 inch TV. Instead we are forced to watch on our phones or on the iPad.
The sad part about all of this is that we let them do this! We allow them to steal snacks and watch the big TV and follow us around. We don't mind sacrificing a few of our own needs for theirs because that's our job right? It's ok but it's also ok to have things that are ours and only ours.
So tell me........what do you do for ME time? What kinds of things do you have that are yours and yours alone?
Moms deserve ME time.
So here's my take on ME time.
I'm all for it. I'm a HUGE advocate. Every mama needs it. Every mama deserves it. Not every mama gets it.
Sure my husband will try to give me some ME time. He says he will play with the kids so I can go upstairs to put some laundry away (because apparently that counts as ME time) or so I can go take a nap or a shower by myself. But let's face it, while dad is a lot of fun (for all of five minutes), eventually the kids always go looking for mama.
Fell down and need a hug and kiss? Where's mama?
Cup empty and need a refill? Where's mama?
Need a new cartoon put on? Where's mama?
All things daddy is completely capable of handling but when it comes to something the kids need, they always go looking for mama.
Don't get me wrong...I love that my kids need me. I love that they know they can count on me. It means I'm doing my job as their mother. They know that no matter what I will be there to help them with whatever they need.
But sometimes mama just needs a break.
I love my kids. I love them like a ridiculous amount and I always miss them when I'm away from them, even if it is just for an hour. But when mama doesn't get her ME time, she gets cranky, tired, impatient. Ain't nobody got time for that.
We are a strong breed, us mamas. We are designed to take a lot of shit and to deal with a lot of shit (literally since my husband gags at the site of shit). We are tough and resilient and we can stick it out for the long haul. But we still need our ME time. We still need time to re energize. To be alone or to be with our friends but to just not be with our kids.
It's not a bad thing!
I want to be able to take care of my kids to the best of my ability. Sometimes that means I need to spend a little time away from them to reboot and recharge. It's completely normal and we shouldn't feel guilty about it as I know many of us mamas do.
I didn't feel this serious need for ME time when I was a working mama. I always felt that the time I had with my girl (since it was just her at the time) was precious and that any second I had not working should be spent with her. I'm sure many other working mamas feel the same way.
And I'm sure many stay at home mams feel the same way I do about ME time. We have kids sticking to us 24/7. We have spills to clean up, meals to make, butts to wipe, fighting to stop, habits to break. Yes, it is our choice to be at home with our children. Yes, we love it. Yes, we are grateful to be able to do it. But that' doesn't mean we don't deserve some ME time.
Working mamas, stay at home mamas, work at home mamas, single mamas, mamas in school....any mama you can possibly think of deserves some ME time.
We also deserve some things to ourselves. I have a stash of mini 100 Grand bars that I have hidden in the bread drawer. They are mine and only mine. I will not share then with the kids because they are mine. They get everything else in the house. They will take food right out of my hands as it's on it's way to my mouth. But they will not get my little mini candy bars.
Maybe that's selfish but it's literally the only thing in the house I don't have to share. I mean they follow me to the bathroom every single time. Do you know how many times a pregnant woman pees in a day? A lot of times. And they always follow.
As soon as they hear a snack bag of any kind or a kitchen cabinet opening, they are on it. They are observing, calculating and stealing whatever it is I am getting. They don't even hesitate, they just take.
Any item that is in my hand becomes a toy to them. Doesn't matter what it is. The TV is for kids shows only. We almost never watch any kind of adult shows on our 52 inch TV. Instead we are forced to watch on our phones or on the iPad.
The sad part about all of this is that we let them do this! We allow them to steal snacks and watch the big TV and follow us around. We don't mind sacrificing a few of our own needs for theirs because that's our job right? It's ok but it's also ok to have things that are ours and only ours.
So tell me........what do you do for ME time? What kinds of things do you have that are yours and yours alone?
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